...my mouth went numb

Its been seven years I thought, seven years how could this happen again. I am not ready for this to happen again. The sadness started to seep in as I realized what I was just told, my moms cancer is back and this time its in her bones.
Spring of '04 was when it first started. My mom had a lump in her breast and after what seemed like a century we found out it was indeed cancerous. The frightening "C" word every person dreads and now its attached its self to one of my family members. One of my most important family members, my mom. Now, as bad as the "C" word is there is something worse then that, as I will come to understand, and that is the waiting. Waiting is torcher. Wait for this test, wait for that test, wait for the surgery, wait for the test to come back from the surgery, wait to see if it has spread. Wait to see how far its spread, wait to see how the treatment will be, wait for the hair to fall out, wait to see if this time she will feel better, wait to see how the next treatment takes, wait to see if the skin will heal. Wait to see if she gets her energy back, wait to see how the next set of test turn out. As I said the waiting is the hardest. Three months, six months, one year, two years.....time went by and the waiting turned into just another day, month, year. Finally 5 years the day that most cancer survivors live for, the five year remission mark. We celebrated, even threw her a big surprise party, she had made it 5 years we were so excited but the funny thing about breast cancer is there is no remission.
Yep, no remission for breast cancer. You could go 3, 5, 8, 25 years and never show any signs that this devil could be hiding in your body just waiting to reappear. So we are still left waiting, waiting for the time when the devil returns and takes another chance to claim her life.
Unfortunately, my day for the wait to end was a few weeks ago when I got "the call". My mom had some pain in her hip for a few months and I was just sure that is was the horrible office chair that she was sitting on at home while she was working. We had a gone on a family trip up to the mountain house, as Addison calls it, and my mom ended up laying in bed crouching in pain. It was so bad she could barley stand. So off to the E.R. they went at 10 p.m. Saturday night where she had more tests and some pain pills and sent home. I didn't give it a second thought I knew she would be fine. It was Tuesday and a work day for me so I was happily working away talking to a client, my phone rang, it was my mom. "They think the cancer is back", she says, "and this time they think its in my bones". My mouth went numb....

Welcome Elivia

Welcome

Elivia Lee Rodgers

November 3, 2009

5 pounds 6 ounces

19 inches Long

One proud daddy.

I'm so happy to finally hold my little love bug.

Addison wasn't able to come see us in the hospital because of the high risk of RSV this year so she was able to meet her when we came home from the hospital. She loved her from the start but once she was around for a few days she wanted me to take her back.

Oh, how time flies!!

2009-2011?? Where did the time go?? Life is so busy that I have put blogging on the back burner until now. I havde made a goal in 2011 to start blogging again. I am going to give you a little look back at what has happened over the past year.

Change is coming.....

Oh goodness has it really been that long since I have updated!! Alot has changed in my little life over the past year or so. More to come so stay tuned.........

Little Artist.

Addison is turning into quite the little Picasso. She loves to do anything that involves being creative. She can even draw stick people, well her version of course.

This is Byron and I
I started her out with "Paint With Water" books but now she can use actual water color paint really well, washable of course. It is so wonderful, I can sit her down with some markers or paint and she will be content and quiet for sometimes more then an hour.


There are however the unfortunate mishaps when she forgets that she can only draw on paper.
Here she was practicing tracing her hands on the coffee table. She didn't even forget the nail polish.

And this is where she decided to give herself some body art while I was busy baking all morning.


For only being 2 1/2 I think her skills are amazing and also VERY convenient.

While I was busy being our family house keeper Addison decided to climb out the doggy door and play outside. Panic stricken I ran throughout the house looking for her and then noticed her happily playing out side in some dirt that Byron had just moved around. Deciding not to disturb the peace I left her out there to play. A little while later I heard the doggy door swing open some grunts and then the pitter patter of little feet coming around the corner and there she was COVERED in dirt. I am not sure how she managed to get that dirty but she did.
Seriously, the pictures don't do it justice.

Utah State Fair

What can I say every year we go, its exactly the same, and I leave saying I am never going again and yet some how I always end up going. I thought that Addison would love to see the animals but since we have our own mini farm she could of cared less. At least she got to ride a pony.

Addison

Marlee

Preslee